~what have i done to deserve this?~

okay lydia. ur not gonna be greedy. u've already promised urself tt wld be the last thing u wished for. LAST. u shld be satisfied with tt, and not ask for more.
but i just CANT! gah.
i hate it when i cant force myself into sth i noe is right but just keep veering off track.
and after realising tt this time i have left for these "things" i "want" is gonna be really short, i feel like i want it.
i actually feel as if we dont have much time left!
me! lydia cheam xiao wei. is PANICKING OVER TIME! wadda heck happened?!
me? miss happy-go-lucky-forgetting-studies-heck-care?? what is wrong with me?

oh for goodness's sakes.








why cant i be satisfied?!








sigh.
anyways, today has been a really busy day. uber tired. started off well.
but the ending sucked.

i hope for more. yet noe i cant.

and i thought u did.. but. i dun wanna have a false hope and lose myself time and time again.
so now, i wld rather suffer everything u went thru, and forget. * random thought* senile!
anyways.. im feeling better now. (sickness) haha.
yeah.just a small little cold and coughing fits.bleahh.
kays. nites dears.
and again.happy belated bday to my wonderful fren, charis!