ahhhh. my blogger's not well AGAIN. >.<

sigh.

how can i be so.. silly?

but i cant help it.
it's not everyday i meet someone who has such a striking resemblance to EDWARD CULLEN
plus.
why do their names have to sound so much alike?!

ahhhh
and why do i like pale skinned guys?
yucks.
now that i said the word "pale", it's revolting!
yet.


jaejoong has pale skiin too.
get what i mean now?

well at least tham and hannah will understand.

comparing him with edward cullen, OBVIOUSLY i'd pick edward. haha
too bad he alr has bella.
and the weirdest thing is.


WHY IN THE WORLD IS HER NAME BELLA?!
that was like the name i always wanted since i was 3.
dont ask me why.
hhaha
now im perfectly fine with lydia. and i absolutely love it.
but i still love the name bella.
maybe cuz bella was my first true friend(=
i'll nv forget her.
haha
but i bet she forgot me alr.
she was in my first kindergarten.
the first friend who had been so nice to me, among the rest of the snarling toddlers that threw sand in my eyes and pushed me down when i was standing on gravel.
yeah, sad to say, im a kid that always gets bullied.
haha
surprising for some of ya'll to hear.
but i've been bullied me till i switched kindergarten, den i was like miss popular, well.
after the previous queen bee of THAT kindergarten left for america.
THEN i was queen bee.
haha
with my whole clique, who obviously cldnt stand her, but dint dare to say anything.

but anyways, after kindergarten, i was bullied again.
this time at the age of 7 in st margerets primary school.
den i changed sch to mgs, since my sis was there.
and AGAIN. bullied.
but not that badly.
just..
got pushed around by kids insulting me all the time.
i think the bullying only stopped when i turned 11, and practically my whole class hated me,
till i shouted at the teacher and threw some stuff at her, i think they got kinda scared.
but anyways, primary 6 was my best year.
those who bullied me, apparently had misunderstood me.
so they all liked me in p.6
haha
and surprisingly they still remember me till this day, when i meet them at orchard road or sth.
i cant even rmb their faces, much less their names.
but anyways, so yeah. p6 was a pretty eventful and smoothsailing year
sec one.

well. that was.
both good and bad.
i wished i dint meet soome ppl in my life.
had the hugest fall of my life so far.
anyways, i still loved it.
i loved sec 2 year the MOST.
partly cuz of my super loyal clique, and we're still together today btw.
haha

but also cuz i managed to get away with lots of stuff.
haha
and. i never once felt.
pressurized. never felt too young or too old either.
and it was when i became comfy with my teen life. haha
sec 3..
okays.
it has been an alright year.
i loved alot of it,
and hated some of it.

I GOT OVER MY FEAR OF INJECTIONS THIS YEAR.
even though im still..kinda scared of the pain and all that.

anyways. how did this post, which was supposed to vent my..
broken heart, end up being a summary of my life?
haha

yeah, actually my life is kinda.
bullied.
hahaha

thats why soometimes, even now, i still get thoughts in my head like
"oh no. why's she staring at me like that?... gosh! was she saying bad stuff about me behind my back just now?? ahhhh"
that kinda thoughts.

and then i'd feel paranoid. and feel upset for feeling that way.


anyways
sometimes i feel like my blog's very restricted.
and there are alot of things i wanna get off my mind, but i just cant.
cuz i know who's reading my blog.
maybe i shld like..
lock my blog
hmm
that's a good idea.
=D

okays, gotta go.
take cares dearies!